Your name is KARKAT VANTAS, and the last thing you want to do at this moment is recall what led to you falling into bed with the most loathsome human you have ever had the misfortune of knowing. Platonically loathsome, that is. But fuck, recalling what led you here has to be less painful than actually experiencing this awful moment of your existence.
Last night, one ROXY LALONDE, FLIGHTY BROAD EXTRAORDINAIRE, decided to throw a WILD DRUNKEN PARTY. This turn of events was not at all unusual. However, you rarely attend these parties, due to your abhorrence for drunken shenanigans and the awful morning afters they entail.
And yet, you decide to attend this particular party, because JOHN EGBERT is a TERRIBLE NO GOOD BLACKMAILING SON OF A BITCH.
Past John: Be a terrible no good blackmailing son of a bitch.
Karkat: Try to recall the chain of events that led you here. (FILL: TEAM KANAYA<3VRISKA)
Last night, one ROXY LALONDE, FLIGHTY BROAD EXTRAORDINAIRE, decided to throw a WILD DRUNKEN PARTY. This turn of events was not at all unusual. However, you rarely attend these parties, due to your abhorrence for drunken shenanigans and the awful morning afters they entail.
And yet, you decide to attend this particular party, because JOHN EGBERT is a TERRIBLE NO GOOD BLACKMAILING SON OF A BITCH.
Past John: Be a terrible no good blackmailing son of a bitch.