miltennious: ([k a r k a t] falling)
sandy ([personal profile] miltennious) wrote in [community profile] hs_olympics 2012-07-09 11:47 am (UTC)

FILL: TEAM ARADIA<> TAVROS - BANJO KAZOOIE (1998)

"We're not going in there, are we?" Karkat demands, in her ear. Jade sighs, rolling her eyes, and bats at his beak to shut him up.

"Karkat, we need his magic!"

"There is no universe where we need Mumbo Dumbo's shitty-ass miracle magic, Harley, you're seriously telling me you wanna rely on a guy who can't pull his head out of his own ass long enough to do more than change us into a washing machine?"

"That was once! Do you have a better plan?!" Jade demands, reaching back over her shoulder to try and grab his neck. Karkat ducks away from her paw with the ease of practice. "We have to save John!"

"Why, so he can leave another bucket of paint over the door and cover us in it?"

"Dave, he is my brother and we are not leaving him in the hands of Eridan the Wizard!"

"You mean wwizard?"

Jade laughs at his Eridan impression. "I mean shut the fuck up we're going inside, Karkat! Gamzee, I have more tokens for you!" Karkat burrows into his bag, still muttering about Gamzee.

"Bitchtits," Gamzee says. Jade coughs, because his hut is filled with incense, and it's only after a moment of pointed coughing from Jade that Karkat sighs dramatically and sticks his wings out. He flaps them a few times in order to blow it away from her face, back across the pool to where Gamzee is sprawled lazily across his throne. "I'm thinking, like, a motherfucking dinosaur this time, you feel me?"

"Oh my god do it," Jade says, practically vibrating with glee, "please, Gamzee!"

"Why the fuck do we want to be a dinosaur, I thought we wanted to be an alligator or some shit," Karkat says, poking his head up over Jade's shoulder.

Gamzee has the audacity to look hurt. Karkat could kill him. "Brother, my motherfucking brother, are you questioning my business practices?"

"You don't have business practices, skullhead, you just take what we give you and transform me into abominations the likes of which this world has never seen nor, frankly, deserves, even if it is a cesspool of brother-stealing-wizards, and you knows it."

"Karkat," Jade says, warning in her tone.

"Oh, fine," Karkat snaps, "just leave me out of this!"

Fifteen minutes and two accidental washing machine-ifications later, Jade is a t-rex, and Karkat is a pigeon. (He's not sure how it happened, but he takes revenge by pooping on both Jade and Eridan, when they crash Jade's-head-first into his lair to rescue John.)

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