BONUS ROUND 5

[hso_mods]

Bonus Round 5

Tales from the Road

Hey, shippers! HSO is winding down, so we thought we'd take a look back at the journey, so to speak. With that in mind, this next bonus round is going to be roadtrip-themed! Give us a little taste of your characters' life on the road, whatever form that takes.

Rules

1. Submit prompts! Prompts should consist of one ship (friendship/gen is fine too!) and a location. This cannot be your team's ship! This round we will not be giving points for prompts.


2. Look through the prompts and fill whichever you like!


3. You may not fill prompts for your ship, nor may you fill your own team's prompts.


4. Fills should be posted as replies to the prompts which they are for, following the format below. They may be any medium.

Title Format
If you are starting a new thread, please use this format in your title.
PROMPT: TEAM [YOUR SHIP]
Replace [YOUR SHIP] with the name of the team YOU belong to; please use the characters and quadrant, not whatever portmanteau or nickname you've come up with.

If you are filling a prompt, use this format in your title.
FILL: TEAM [YOUR SHIP]
Replace [YOUR SHIP] with the name of the team YOU belong to; please use the characters and quadrant, not whatever portmanteau or nickname you've come up with.
If your team name is not in this format and in the title we cannot guarantee that it will be counted.

Posts not using this format in the title will be understood to be unofficial discussion posts, no matter what they contain. They, like all comments on the comm, are subject to the Wank Policy.

Scoring
For fills (as stated here):
First 5 entries in each post: 30 (per entry)
Entries 6-10 in each post: 20 (per entry)
Entries 11-15 in each post: 10 (per entry)
Entries 16+ in each post: 5 (per entry)

All scored content must be created/assembled new for this round.

If you have any questions, please ask them at the FAQ post here, or email them to us (homestuck.shipping at gmail). Otherwise, we cannot guarantee that we will see them in a timely fashion!

Bonus Round 5 is now closed!

16/08/12 Comments are unscreened again, for the sake of comments on fills. No new fills are being counted for points.

Comments

PROMPT: TEAM KARKAT<3NEPETA

[slippy]

Ship: Mindfang <3< Dualscar

Location: a safe haven

PROMPT: TEAM ENGLISH

[cerulean_neuf]

Ship: Tavros c3< Eridan c3< Kanaya

(your choice on who does the auspisiticizing;
auspisitice can involve chainsaw, wand,peace/talk, threats, etc...)

Location: PROJECT RUNWAY

PROMPT: TEAM TEREZI<3VRISKA

[mishfin]

dave<3rose
san francisco!

Re: PROMPT: TEAM TEREZI<3VRISKA

[ex_civilian608]

MAN WHY CAN'T I FILL THIS PROMPT.........

PROMPT: TEAM ENGLISH

[cerulean_neuf]

Ship: Liv Tyler (Bunny) <3 Midnight Crew

Location: Build-A-Bear-Workshop

PROMPT: TEAM JADE<3JOHN<3KARKAT

[zoamh]

Eridan<>Jake
Metropolis

FILL: TEAM JADE<3KARKAT

[oxfordroulette]

(I hope this is what you meant by Metropolis---- this fill will be 100% better if you've watched Fritz Lang's Metropolis)

You were the head, he was the hands.

You were never meant to meet, but lolly-gagging with your waves of topless Biblical bitches got boring, and you followed him into depths unsuitable for even your right pinky toe. You stood out awkwardly amongst the workers in the tired tunnels, but all of them ignored your scent when Jake started preaching about equality. His words were like huge rubber bullets shooting through rock. Unbelievably powerful, but he was no orator. Not like you.

Loneliness had crept up on you and overtook you at the top of your city. Your friends were superfluous and would betray you for a mediocre sloe gin. When you watched him that day in the rocks, you fell into a blissful state hampered by greed, wanting to take him and pap him until your shallow, wealthy skin fell away.

You had a long adventure. Stories for another time and day, stories about robot clones, lost loves, and barren prostitution. At the end, you two had become something different.

No longer the head. No longer the hands. You are both the heart. The sweet tie between the proletariat and skankily rich.

So, here you wait. In your airship teetering to the Tower of Babel. The boy who loved firearms but spoke against them sits shotgun.

You turn on the radio.

Jake tells you he loves the song. You do too. There's silence between you as you look at the journey ahead. Your last bit of freedom --a joy ride allotted to you-- before you fall into responsibility and fulfil your ever beating role.

"What do you say we get going, old chap?" he grins.

"I don't want this trip to ever fucking end," you say. "We'll be working for equality until the day we die, and for what?"

"This trip wont end, Eridan," he says, lightly tapping your hand. "The road ahead will last forever if we want it to. Even when we return, there are plenty of new, boot-buckling adventures waiting for us!"

You check the propeller one last time, then ride the wind into new heights.

PROMPT: TEAM TEREZI<3VRISKA

[mishfin]

john<3vriska
times square

FILL: TEAM DAVE<3JADE

[watchfob]

“Remind me why we’re here again?”



It’s cold and crowded and awfully bright for night time. John’s been dragging you around the country for the past few weeks, wanting to show you all the awesome stuff earth has to offer! (and by earth i mean america, he’d added. there’s tons of crazy weird stuff here, and we are going to see it all, and it is going to be great.) You had agreed, but it was only later that you would realize just what exactly a road trip with John Egbert entailed.

This is the last stop. The city is called New York, and it is very big, loud, and active. Apparently it’s one of the most famous cities in the world, but you’ve been pretty much unimpressed so far. It has a lot of tall buildings. So what? You fail to see the attraction.

“We’re going to see the--”

“Ball drop, yeah, I know,” you finish for him. “That was a rhetorical question.”

“Aw, lighten up, Vriska!” he says, bumping you slightly with his shoulder. “This is a pretty big deal! Lots of people have ‘see the ball drop in Times Square’ on their bucket list.”

“Well, I’m boooooooored. And it’s freezing. How much longer are we going to have to stand around waiting for this thing?” You've already had to stand here for quite a long time. Some people, John told you earlier, wait all day for a good spot. You can't imagine spending that much time in one place.

John checks his watch.

“Fifteen minutes,” he announces, and you let out a small groan.

“Come on, do you want some glasses? I can get you some. It’ll help you get into the New Year’s spirit!”

You snort.

“I’m good, thanks.”

“You’re passing up a perfect opportunity to sport authentic human fashion.”

“Strangely, I have no problem with this.”

“I understand if you’re afraid of looking bad next to me. There aren’t many people who can pull off this look.”

“John, you look ridiculous.”

“No, I look fun.”



“And fun is what tonight is all about! That and also getting drunk and promising yourself a bunch of things you probably will not keep.”

“This holiday is dumb,” you say, and attempt to bury yourself in your jacket. It doesn’t help much.

The crowd around you begins to scream. The violent assault on your auricular sponge clots is far from pleasant, but John’s grin grows wider and he turns around.

“It’s started!” he shouts. You can barely hear him. People begin to push forward, bumping into you, and forcing you up against those standing in front of you. It’s uncomfortable and a bit alarming and you can’t help but get a little jumpy when everyone starts to count down in unison.

10!

John turns to you. His hat’s fallen off and his silly glasses are gone. There’s excitement in his eyes, as well as something mischievous. He’s ready to max out his prankster’s gambit, and that makes you a bit nervous.

9!

“John?” you ask. You almost can’t hear yourself.

8!

“Don’t be alarmed!”

7!

“Why would I be alarmed?”

6!

“I’m about to do something, alright?”

5!

“What?”

4!

“Earth custom!”

3!

He grabs your shoulders.

2!

He’s close enough that you can feel his breath on your face. The warmth of it makes your cheeks burn.

1!

His lips find yours.

The square erupts into a singular “Happy New Year!” Confetti rains from the sky.

Maybe this holdiay isn’t so dumb, after all.

PROMPT: TEAM TEREZI<3VRISKA

[mishfin]

eridan<3karkat
hawaii!

FILL: Team Karkat<3Karkat

[doubleohally]

Hopefully there aren't too many mistakes, I really need to learn to quit writing at four am.


"Why are we here," Karkat grumbled under his breath, his arms crossed. Eridan loved when Karkat was like this because he knew that it meant he was happy. There's a subtle difference between when Karkat is actually mad, and when he's just acting that way because he's embarrassed; a subtle difference to people who didn't know him very well. If you took the time to actually see him for who he was then it would be very clear.



"Wwell, obvviously because wwe are takin a vvacation," he said smugly his hands on his hips like he actually said something that was worth being smug about. He quickly realized how dumb he sounded once he was on the receiving end of one of Karkats glares. "Fine, ugh, you're not any fun today Mr. Grumpy pants," he teased wiggling a finger before nervously jerking it back, almost afraid Karkat would bite him (he did that once).



"UGH," he pouted in a manner that made your blood pusher feel like it was going to burst out of your chest, "fine." He gave off a along sigh. Eridan could tell that he found the sentiment to be a tad bit endearing and hopefully at least a little pitiful.



After everything they had went through: dying repeatedly and coming back to life, getting stuck on a human planet that wasn't quite entirely human anymore--they deserved some good down time. They roomed together in a small apartment even though they had enough money to live nearly anywhere they wanted; they loved the comfort of being in a small area so close together. Eridan pretend he didn't notice Karkat cried in his sleep, even though he was sure Karkat knew he knew.

This was why he needed to get away from everything for awhile.



"That's right Kar, you are completely and totally glad that I decided to take you wwith me, I could have taken anyone but I took you." Eridan knows that if Karkat were anyone else he would have made a jab about how, really, there wasn't anyone else. These are the reasons Eridan Ampora loves Karkat Vantas, he wouldn't really hurt him. Good, honest, ironic, repartee is one thing--hateful jabs are another.



They both knew the truth, even if Karkat wouldn't say it.



"So, why did you want to come here specifically?"



"Wwell," he shrugged, "Davve said this wwas a good place, noww that I think about it maybe that wwasn't a good person to ask." Karkat doesn't even bother acknowledging that, while Dave and Eridan weren't close enough to go somewhere together they had made some weird bound over shitty photos or something equally stupid.



"Yeah, but what even is it, it's one of those state things but what's so special about this huh way ee place?"



Eridan never answered because Eridan didn't know; and while they both ended up catching a small cold and weren't actually able to leave the motel room since it was too hot for their tastes, they both had a good time anyway.



Nothing was better to either of them than being with each other.

PROMPT: TEAM ENGLISH

[cerulean_neuf]

Ship: Terezi / Karkat (any quadrant)

Location: Willy Wonka's Candy Factory

FILL: TEAM DAVE <3< GAMZEE

[rradioactiveppanda]

.

PROMPT: TEAM NEPETA<3TEREZI

[fraymotif]

jade<>jake wildlife safari adventure

FILL: TEAM SOLLUX<>TEREZI

[sirlampalot]

"Though... I have a bugger of a feeling that this little guy didn't make the footprints we saw earlier..."

eheheheh

PROMPT: TEAM DIRK<3JAKE<3JANE<3ROXY

[nextian]

Karkat<>Kanaya, Land of Rays and Frogs

FILL: TEAM ARADIA<>SOLLUX

[possibly_thrice]

She doesn't meet him in person until well after they're both safely in the game. They're not FLARPers, and the desert is a long way from Karkat's quiet lawnring. The desert is a long way from everywhere.

The Land of Rays and Frogs is in some ways a still more isolated expanse; there's something profoundly quiet about the rush of light over water, the deep transparent seas. Where in the desert speech could carry for miles and for years, and the echoes of other people's lives wandered, hungry, across sand, LORAF damps every disturbing sound, and drinks the bodies up.

But Karkat comes from the sky, building through her gate until he can leap safely from roof to fragmentary earth. And, for all that she's never seen him, he looks like she thought he would. It's remotely gratifying to see him struggle and swear as he brushes mud from his pants (the leap, though safe, was not uneventful), to trace the inefficient splay of hands-over-knees. "What?" he says, when he sees her looking at him-- "what?" when she almost laughs.

"Let me help you," she says, and goes to get a brush.



When everyone has been straightened out and combed vigorously, Karkat is clearly tired: his eyes rusty at the corners and his pupils claustrophobically small. He insists, however, on commencement. "We have time," says Kanaya, with a certainty she will lose, but which now resides somewhere in the center of her, settled richly beneath her ribs. "The cloning of Bilious Slick is urgent, but it is not a matter for Knights zombified by sleep debt."

"Where the fuck would I sleep?" says Karkat, apparently unable to directly contradict her assessment of his alertness levels.

"You would be welcome to my coon," says Kanaya, feeling daring. Karkat looks at her sharply, but not lengthily; he is too far gone for sustained edges. They are all low on sopor, and while Kanaya's sleep tends to be restful with or without ameliorating agents, she knows that Karkat has yet to wake up, has yet to learn how pleasant dreams can be. How very useful.

"Well," he says, grudging as he ever was on Trollian, "I guess. But you should at least show me the set-up first."

She does.



After that they are productive. They range farther and farther out, until her hive is a white wedge on the too-curved horizon, and for miles around there is nothing but interlinking bodies of water and land. And, of course, the ceaseless pinstriped sky. Karkat overheats rapidly in his heavy sweater and long trousers; LORAF is humid, though from inside her room she thought it looked cool as a highblood's kiss. The heat gathers slowly and then, all at once, solidifies. Karkat never takes his sweater off.

Truth be told, she's disappointed. Karkat has always been vulnerable, but she was hoping for some signature reveal, now that they are spending so much time together, face to face. As she is sure they will succeed in breeding the frog, she is sure he will eventually bare his weaknesses to her directly. They have meandering conversations that loop back in on themselves, and that, too, is part of her campaign; like breeding frogs, it can only takes so many repetitions until he shows a flaw.

But Kanaya is patient. She's done with Vriska's endless mess, the violence of her confessions. Karkat may be a surprisingly tough nut to crack, but that's part of the pleasure of it: like the way he sits hunched in on himself, rather than occupying as much space as he possibly can. Like the way the gravity of his presence doesn't alter the way she perceives the surrounding world. His hair falls in his eyes and thrashes outward from his nape, but it's not untamable, not wild, not full of hopeless and unreachable dark.



At Skaiaset they sit with their feet in the water, watching the rays penetrate the lake. They fall straight as yardsticks from the sky, long and fine and brilliant, but when they hit water they bend like straws.

"We're never going to make it," says Karkat, his tone full of unfamiliar despair. They have hit setbacks. His unhappiness, though, is disproportionate to the significance of the obstacles they face. Kanaya pats him kindly on the back, though, knowing that the important thing is that she is here for him in his strange, diffuse upset. And he leans into the touch.

"We will so," she tells him. "We will make it. Both figuratively and also literally, by which I mean, we will create the frog whose tremendous blowsack will host a universe."

"You're so full of crap," says Karkat, and looks for a moment like he wants to lean his head on her shoulder. Kanaya holds herself very still, trying to make a somewhat bony joint look as inviting as possible, but it's apparently insufficient, because after a moment he brings his knees up to rest against his chest, his bare toes dripping water, his bare feet shining in reflected bands.

Sometimes she misses Vriska so much that it's impossible to stand.

"Karkat," she says, and there's something in her voice, opening like a chasm. She moves her mouth around the forest of her teeth. She goes on. "I've seen it. I've seen our success. Don't you trust the vaporous emissaries of our creative guiding force?"

He looks at her, blindly. His mouth trembles like a suspended stone.

PROMPT: TEAM AUTORESPONDER<3ROXY

[teakei]

Aradia<>Dave
Roman Forum

PROMPT: TEAM DIRK<3JAKE<3JANE<3ROXY

[nextian]

WV, PM, AR (shippy or no): Skaia

PROMPT: TEAM DIRK<3JAKE<3JANE<3ROXY

[nextian]

Vriska/Terezi, San Francisco

FILL: TEAM ARADIA<>SOLLUX

[possibly_thrice]

On Alternia, no one would dare name a bridge golden unless it was the congealed consequence of a million leaking psiioniics. You find that you prefers the human approach, which, while ranging from the counterintuitive to the downright illogical, does allow for the cinnamon smudge that rides the milky horizon to fill your nostrils with its spicy breadth.

Vriska pronounces it snoozeworthy, and pulls on your arm until you begin to think fondly about ripping it off and beating her over the head with it. The only thing really preventing you is that the symmetry would be so poetic as to grow painful. Instead you turn around so fast that Vriska has to let go of your elbow, and say, "Fine! What would you like to see?"

Vriska seems taken aback. She has seemed taken aback since you found her, quiet and recessed in a way that would look nauseatingly boisterous on anyone but her. She's Vriska, and she will always chafe, but she's-- trying, and for once in her lives her desperate efforts give off light but not heat. Maybe it's something she learned following a dead John through the streets of his winterbound city; how to fade.

You don't like it. You think you wanted it, once, more than anything.

"I don't know," she's saying, and you smell the shape of her mouth, how it fattens and thins like a fish's against glass. Through the clear salt-flavored air, it reeks of low-hanging fruit: blueberries grown glaucous and dark under leaves. "Somewhere cool. What about the Empire State Building?"

"That's in New York," you say, leaving off the dumbs. You are so full of compassion that you might vomit pity if you don't control the movement of your breath. "This is San Francisco."

"Whatever," says Vriska. "I can't keep these human names straight. They're so boring! They don't mean anything."

You think of the bridge behind you, the bay at the bottom of the hill. "San Francisco was the name of one of their saints," you tell her. You have been doing your reading. Wikipedia has no holographs and will never spit an informative grub into your lap if you hit download, but it is endearingly haphazard, like a thornbush or a person.

"What's a saint?" asks Vriska. Once she would have pretended to know.

"I'm not sure," you say. You offer her your hand, and after a moment she takes it. Her palm is cool and dry cupped over yours.

Ahead of you there is a precipitous drop, a road so steep you can't imagine why the land wasn't terraformed, leveled to lay even with the sea. But humans, lazy, kind, sometimes leave land unshaped, choosing not to soften its bitter bones.

The sun, golden, skates down the roofs of the parked cars. It descends stairwise; to lose itself below.

PROMPT: TEAM ERIDAN<3SOLLUX

[evapples]

Signless<3/<>Psiioniic
Disneyworld

FILL: TEAM Karkat♥Sollux

[turntecharmageddon2]

Probably NOT what you were looking for but I hope you enjoy it anyway. When I saw you icon I knew I had to fill it.


“It’s been a long time since we went through the old photo albums, huh Sollux?”

“Whatever you thay dad.” The boy rolls his eyes and sinks further into the couch. “It wath latht month.”

“Still been a while.” His eyes land on the old dust covered photo album, “How about instead of looking at pictures of your mom and then crying, we look at something else.” He holds the book up for Sollux to see.

“What’th in there?”

“These are pictures from when I was about your age.” He dusts the book off as he moves to join Sollux on the couch.

His son perks up curiously. “Really, were you anything like me?”

The man smiles and reaches over and ruffles Sollux’s hair. “I wasn’t as angsty.” Sollux sticks out his tongue. “And I most certainly didn’t mutilate my body. Now get that back in your mouth before I cut it off.”

“Ehehe, you wouldn’t do that.”

“You’re right, too much blood to clean up.” He opens the album, Sollux scoots closer , and he begins telling his son who everybody was and what was happening when each picture was taken to the best of his memory.

“I didn’t know you liked boyth.”

He laughs, “Your mom was actually the exception. I told you, you and I weren’t so different.” You avoid looking at the picture.

“He lookth tho much like kk, ith that why you like him tho much? Nobody elthe parentth like him.”

“That’s part of the reason, but he’s really a good kid just a little rough around the edges.”

A smile tugs up on Sollux’s lips. “When wath thith picture taken?”

“It was the summer between my sophomore and freshmen year. I was fifteen at the time and still lispy.” Sollux sticks out his tongue again wiggling the two sides in different ways. His dad wrinkles his nose in mock disgust.

“Did you like him?”

“I was in love with him. Even now I’m convinced I was. He was my best friend, and he was pretty much perfect in every way. I just wanted him to be happy, and to make sure he kept smiling.” He finally caves and looks down at the picture, if you didn’t know any better you’d say it was your son and his best friend in the picture wearing ironic matching mouse hats. Only you know that their hands wouldn’t be interlaced like that, and Karkat wouldn’t look that happy whether or not he was.


He remembers that day fondly, back at Disneyland, where his confession had spilled from his like water and the other boy had kissed him hard, but sweet.

It seems like a dream now, and maybe it was.

“Where ith he now?”

“I don’t know. The last I heard from him was at me and your mother’s wedding.” You set the book down, “He told me that he couldn’t come because he couldn’t stand to see the man he loved married off to another.”

“But I theen him in your wedding pictuerth.” Sollux blinks up at him.

“He came, pretended to be happy for me, and maybe in a way he actually was. But after that I never saw or heard from him again.”

Sollux stares at his knees, “Do you ever regret marrying mom?”

“That’s a loaded question. Sometimes I do. Don’t get me wrong, I loved your mother dearly, and I have you now and I wouldn’t trade you for anything in the world. It’s just I have to wonder where life would be if I hadn’t married your mother. If I had just walked away when he asked me too.”

“Have you ever thought of trying to find him?”

“Of course, Sollux, but I wouldn’t know where to start.” There’s a loud banging on the door that could only belong to Karkat. “Run along now, have fun.”

Sollux stands up with a nod. “I’ll let you know what’s going on.” He grabs his laptop bag sitting by the door and he’s out it in a flash.

He spends the rest of the day lost in his memories. Sollux calls him and tells him he’s staying over at Karkat’s. So he eats dinner alone.

TA: 293-281-2823 call him
SP: where’d you get it?
TA: you don’t want two know, ju2t call him

After an hour of thinking about it, you do.

PROMPT: TEAM NEPETA<3TEREZI

[fraymotif]

AR<3PM<3WV
washington dc

PROMPT: TEAM JADE<3KARKAT

[thecreepyone]

john♥jade

gravity falls

FILL: TEAM DAD♥ROXY

[tawny]

Click for art! (warning: incest)

will probably fix this up later...

PROMPT: TEAM ERIDAN<3SOLLUX

[evapples]

Karkat/Sollux (any quadrant)
Land of Light and Rain

PROMPT: TEAM ERIDAN<3SOLLUX

[evapples]

Dirk<3Jake
Silent Hill

Fill: Team Dirk<3Jake<3Jane<3Roxy

[playerprophet]

It's been a slow start here at the institute, since I'm surrounded by fucking idiots at every turn. These people couldn't tell you what the sharp end of a scalpel looks like, let alone how to perform brain surgery. How these children ever got through med school is beyond me. I have to teach them everything they should know all over again. I'm a doctor not a goddamn teacher.

All the people here seem to not be entirely at home. I think that maybe living in a hellhole in buttfuck nowhere might be the cause or they're all hopped up sniffing some drug they're not sharing. Might help me fucking put up with them if I couldn't tell the difference between the sternohyoid or sternocleidomastoid either. Fuck if I'm going to renew this contract. These interns could shit in each other's faces for all I care.

I'm not sure if I can last the year that I signed up for. It's all on a contract but I'm kicking myself in the ass for not manipulating in some sort of loophole to get the hell out of dodge.

It would all be fine if you were here. I promised myself I wouldn't guilt you on sentimental horseshit anymore but I guess in the end I couldn't fucking help it. Figures.

I miss you.

-DS

Jake folded the letter back up and laid it neatly on the floor next to the new letter - the older-looking letter. The hospital, like several other places, had swung between an old, dusty, to becoming what Jake could only call the prison cells of hell, oozing with blood and fire and rusty metal grates. He curled up in the corner of one of those rooms, having the fucking bejeesus scared out of him, and took solace behind a heavy metal door and a hospital bed. He had to read Dirk's letter to remember why he was there.

There was something out there, and it was after Jake. Something large, tall and muscular and wearing an apron splattered with blood and other disturbing things. Jake had never gotten a look at its head. He wasn't even sure it had one. There were other things too, emaciated nurses that moved like nothing he had ever seen and bearing sharp knives that they sure knew how to use, holy moly. Jake had already stopped to stitch up a nasty wound in his side when one of them had clipped him when he had a rifle and she came in too close. Sometimes he shivered and he wondered if it must have gotten infected. Of course he hadn't brought a first-aid kit into a fucking city. He hadn't expected something like this.

Jake peeked over the hospital bed and cast his flashlight back and forth across the room, clearing it, just in case. That door wouldn't be quiet to open but stranger things had already happened in that place. With a sigh of relief he lowered himself back to his butt on the floor, grabbing for his shotgun and moving it so it rested safely at his left, just in case. Then he put his flashlight into his front pocket and picked up the new letter, his hands trembling. He would recognize that penmanship anywhere, and the orange glittering gel pen left no doubt who it was by. It seemed to be brushed with rust, and with drops of blood. Please don't let it be his please don't let it be his


To who the fuck ever,

I officially resign from my position in this hellhole piece of shit hospital. I don't care if it goes against the contract I signed. I don't care if you all sue me so badly that you have to confiscate my fucking dick and put it up for auction at a state sale. I'm an getting the fuck out of this motherfucking town.

The doctors are idiots, the nurses are worse, and I think the upper management must just sit in their giant offices just seeing what sorts of staplers and pencil sharpeners they can jam up their rectums, because they sure as hell don't show their ugly fucking faces down here. And I am not doing surgery getting that shit out.

Jake laughed, so full of love and appreciation that he couldn't help himself. He nervously looked at the door and waited for a few moments before turning back to the page. Dirk oh Dirk please be safe somewhere.

You're all brainwashed god-fucking heathens and I don't even give a shit about your religion or what you practice usually, but the people in this town are fucking insane. No surgery will fix you. No rehabilitation, no therapy, no drugs will fix this place. The only solution there is would be an atom bomb to put you all out of your misery.

Come keep me from leaving this place. I dare you.

-DS

Jake sniffed and ran a thumb across his nose. He flipped through the paper and read it again before folding it up and into Dirk's other note, placing both of them safely in his front left pocket. Jake couldn't imagine the town trying to put up a fight against Dirk Strider. What a joke. If they did it would probably look something like a bunch of crazy townsfolk all going up against Dirk just like in that movie, 300.

But if he made it out of here, where did he go? What happened to him?

Jake made sure his shoes were tied tight and his backpack was securely hitched over both shoulders before picking up his shotgun and placing it on the hospital bed with a mysterious lump in the middle. Pillows, Jake assured himself. He wiped his glasses on his shirt, but it made things worse. His shirt was filthy and he cursed quietly and put his glasses back on. He'd have to see if one of the bathrooms had water, but not in hell - only in the spooky village. The hell bathrooms seemed to love the scare the everloving shit out of him. Jake ran his hands through his hair. He checked the map he found in the lobby, and folded it up again.

The door into the hallway was far, far too loud and his radio crackled with static as soon as he got it open a crack. He peered into the darkness and sees nothing. Maybe on the other side of the hall, or down around the corner. It was a pretty small hospital, but big enough for things to be hiding in all sorts of shadows in the dark. He took the shotgun in both hands and pushed the door open with his shoulder.


Hey, Jake.

Roxy says you aren't going to be at this address for too long. Off into the woods or something, so I'm not sure if you'll ever get this but I guess I'm feeling a bit maudlin and wanted to get this shit off my chest. I know you say all the time that I don't talk enough about what I actually feel and Roxy says I just manipulate people instead and you're both right, so here goes.

I fucked up, I really did. I'm sorry I made you feel like you had to leave. I don't think you meant for this to be a long-distance thing from now on but I hope you did. I want it to be, because you were the only one I ever wanted. You know that. I tell it to you all the time. Well, I told it to you. Maybe not enough, or maybe it didn't really matter.

If you've got your mind made up then this letter won't mean anything anyway. If not, then it would be great if you could mail me back, or message me, or give me a call.

They offered me a job at this town. It's a promotion. I think I might go. It's on a lake and it seems to have some interesting history, but it's in the middle of nowhere. Still, some new place might make me feel a little less miserable with you gone. There are a lot of memories in this apartment.

I'll send you the address and my new number just in case. My door is always open for you.

I never said it enough, but I love you, Jake.

-DS

PROMPT: TEAM NEPETA<3TEREZI

[fraymotif]

aradia<>tavros

silent hill

Re: PROMPT: TEAM NEPETA<3TEREZI

[fraymotif]

crud i swear to god i didnt see the person above me post that first

PROMPT: TEAM ROSE<3ROXY

[adaorardor]

Aradia<>Sollux

THE TWIN CITIES.

[tehstripe]

I keep reading that as "THE TWIN CUTIES"

just thought you should know

PROMPT: TEAM Nepeta<3Terezi

[vulturer]

ship: Jade/Kanaya (any quadrant)
location: Saturn's Rings

FILL: TEAM DIRK<3JAKE<3JANE<3ROXY

[veira]

They are 48 hours from go time when Kanaya finally cracks the deep freeze on the cryogenics pod and brings Jade out of stasis. It takes 24 hours for her to thaw and regain high brain function. She finally steps from the chamber shivering and naked, tail between her legs and ears tipped back unhappily. Jade dresses quickly in the heavy spacer's overalls that Kanaya has laid out for her, hugging them close to regain the warmth she hasn't felt for the seven years it took Cassini 5 to transverse from Earth to Saturn orbit. There's no gravity in the exploration orbiter. The chambers inside are clean and white and perfect, ready for all the exciting exploration and science that's to come.

But first they have to achieve orbit!

Jade grins and pulls herself hand over hand through the zero gee, passing from the storage bay through the expansive science center and beyond that to the cockpit snuggled into the very front of the orbiter. The instrument array is sprinkled out in front of her, multicolored keyboards and buttons and switches and tiny glowing monitors just waiting for something to do. Something to analyze and pull knowledge out of. After seven years, it's finally time for Cassini 5 to do the duty it was designed for. Jade is going to learn all there is to know about Saturn and her beautiful moons and she can barely contain her enthusiasm.

"Kanaya!" she says with a smile as she slips into the seat in front of the main keyboard and straps herself in. "Wow, I know it only feels like it's been a few weeks to me, but it's been seven years for you! How've you been? How many truths of the universe have you solved in the mean time?" She laughs because it's more likely Kanaya spent her time reworking Earth fashion every season by proxy and reading the endless torrent of horrible vampire novels that are beamed out to her every month.

"I've been well. Although the only universal truth I have managed to lay to rest is the merciful extermination of capes from Earth fashion."

Jade laughs. Kanaya's voice is rich and full of as much smiling fondness as Jade's is. The only difference is that it comes from the big speakers set into the walls. Kanaya is a computer program, although she used to be alive once upon a time. Jade knows all about the complex processes that condense the fleshy folds of the human brain to bits and bytes in a multi-teraflop mainframe. Almost as much as she knows about the fancy space-age genetics that were spliced into Jade herself to make her better at thriving in space, so she could come out here and pour herself into the research she and Kanaya are about to spend a decade doing in Saturn orbit.

"You'll have to catch me up on everything that's going on back home." Jade's fingers dance over the keyboards, bringing parts of the orbiter to life that have lain dormant for years. The spacecraft responds like a warm friend. She grins to herself. "Oh wow, this is exciting. There's so much to do. Here, let me take over some of these boot-ups for you so you can concentrate on getting us into the snuggliest orbit!"

"Ah, thank you." Kanaya is nothing but a smiling emoticon in the corner of Jade's screen, white vampire fangs peeping out of pretty green lipstick. "That frees up a bit of my RAM. I stowed my ambulatory robot in order to concentrate on orbital injection protocols. As soon as we are safe and sound through the E-Ring void I should be able to take it out again and help you set up for initial magnetic field analysis."

"That sounds like fun!" She wiggles her eyebrows seductively and adds, "I know they say that sometimes you lose brain cells in cryofreeze, but I definitely remember how hot your android is!"

The little emoticon winks, then blows Jade a pink pixel kiss. "And I have not forgotten what a charmer you are. I have missed speaking with you, Jade. It will be quite enjoyable to catch up. I have collected a library of anime and obscure music while you were sleeping. Perhaps we could once again enjoy some of it together in your down time?"

Jade giggles and rolls her eyes. "But science first!"

"Science definitely comes first," Kanaya responds with a smile. "Ten minutes to primary rocket burn."

She hasn't felt the tug of rocket acceleration in years and Jade grins to herself, so ready to kick off this marvelous science adventure.

PROMPT: TEAM NEPETA<3TEREZI

[fraymotif]

feferi/vriska gen

motorcity

PROMPT: TEAM Nepeta<3Terezi

[vulturer]

ship: Dave/Nepeta (gen)
location: Torre Argentina cat sanctuary in Rome

Re: PROMPT: TEAM Nepeta<3Terezi

[doubleohally]

Even though I've never wrote for either of these characters I want to do this but the location is that like

A cat cemetery or is this place http://www.romancats.com/index_eng.php

if not can you tell me something about it or how to find info on it?

Prompt: TEAM ERIDAN<3SOLLUX

[eyeslikestarlight]

Dirk/Roxy ( <> or <3 )
college (to or from, one or both)

PROMPT: TEAM JADE<3KARKAT

[thecreepyone]

dave♥terezi

applebees

FILL: TEAM DAVE<3DAVE

[alouetta]

She leads you past the booths and into a shitty shabby office at the far end where the orange light of the hanging lamps doesn’t reach and where the metalwork hearts and vintage clocks and rusting street signs – back-of-the-truck shit cribbed from eBay as opposed to lovingly salvaged from the warm loving hold of central America’s backyard sales – just stop. It’s bare and white-walled and she kicks back in an orange wheely chair, leaving you the plastic seat across the desk from her. Her shades are red and yours are black. You’re not used to talking with anyone who keeps their eyes hidden.

She has files on her desk but she doesn’t consult them.

H3LLO M1ST3R STR1D3R
1 H4V3 4 SHORT L1ST OF QU3ST1ONS D3S1GN3D TO L3V3R OP3N TH3 CR3V1C3S 4ND CR4CKS OF YOUR P3RSON4L1TY UNT1L TH3Y 4R3 3XPOS3D TO WH4T 1 4M R3L14BLY 1NFORM3D 4R3 H4RSH 4ND FL1CK3R1NG N3ON OV3RH34DS
‘YOU’ B31NG WH1CH3V3R BR1GHT 3Y3D 4SP1R4NT S1TS B3FOR3 M3 4T TH3 T1M3
4ND ‘M3’ B31NG TH3 H4RSH 4ND FL1CK3R1NG OV3RH34DS
4S W3LL 4S TH3 4CTU4L OV3RH34DS 4LSO B31NG TH3 OV3RH34DS
H3R3 4T 4PPL3B33S 4N AB1L1TY TO MULT1T4SK 1S 3SS3NT14L!

cool whatever lets just get the preliminaries done with
my fave color is applebees orange
my party trick is whipping up a mean steak for every drunkass stumble fuck in the club
my greatest strength is the passion with which i provide for each and every customer that offers my employer their custom to the absolute physical limits of my capability
yet paradoxically this passion burns me from within and is therefore also my greatest weakness

BL4H BL4H BL4H
YOU 4R3 SO F4R ON TH3 WRONG TR4CK 1T W1LL PROB4BLY B3 Y34RS B3FOR3 TH3 P4RK R4NG3RS F1ND YOUR BODY 1N TH3 BUSH3S!
T4CKL3 TH1S:
WH4T 1S YOUR F4VOR1T3 4PPL3B33S D1SH YOUNG M4N

depends whos paying

FOR TH3 PURPOS3S OF TH1S ROL3PL4Y L3T US 4SSUM3 1T 1S 1 WHO W1LL B3 SHOULD3R1NG TH3 F1N4NC14L BURD3N 4T TH3 3ND OF TH1S HYPOTH3T1C4L D4T3 N1GHT
WH4T W1LL YOU CHOOS3 M1ST3R STR1D3R!

well that changes everything doesnt it
sign me up for the quesadilla steak stack

CONV1NC3 M3

what that i want a steak stack
i literally just told you were you too occupied by thoughts of our budding buffet bar passion to even listen
rude
but flattering
but rude

CONV1NC3 M3 TO G3T TH3 ST34K YOU DUMB4SS 1 4M T3ST1NG YOUR S4L3S 4B1L1T13S

ok shut your eyes

1M BL1ND >:/

dont give a shit
im setting a mood here
are your eyes shut

UGH FOR TH3 S4K3 OF 1MM3RS1ON 4ND SUSP3NS1ON OF D1SB3L13F MY 3Y3S 4R3 NOW SHUT

k good
im gonna walk you through this step by step
the first hard thrust of your forks hard tines
deep into the moist quivering flesh of the steak
are you in the zone yet
if youre in the zone youll be so immersed you just heard the squelch of vigorous entrance as i described it
fingers quivering expectantly as you raise that hot wet meat to your open mouth
a sensation tsunami hits you like katrina as the first juices trickle down your tongue
you begin to salivate like a dog in a diner while i

W41T! 1 N33D TO P4RS3 TH1S
1F 4 CUSTOM3R 4SK3D YOU WOULD T3LL TH3M TO G3T TH3 ST34K B3C4US3 1T R3M1NDS YOU OF P3RFORM1NG OR4L S3X ON M3N
4ND TH1S 1S 4 PL34SUR4BL3 4SSOC14T1ON FOR YOU

what
no

NO?
COULD 1T POSS1BLY B3 TH4T 1 M1SUND3RSTOOD YOUR 4RTFULLY R1FF3D 1NNU3NDO? >:O
QU1CK M1ST3R STR1D3R!
T3LL M3 WH4T YOU R34LLY M34NT

She tips her shades and directs a spit-white glare to just above your hairline. Something terrible roils in your stomach and you’re not sure you’ve ever been so shitscared to tell a lie.

i was suggesting that
maybe you

Y3S

uh

DO NOT L3T M3 STOP YOU

enjoy

UH HUH

blowjobs

4ND DO YOU TH1NK TH1S W4S 4N 4PPROPR14T3 TOP1C TO R41S3?
WH3N YOU CR4V3 TH1S JOB W1TH SUCH SH4M3L3SS 4ND 3XCRUC14T1NG D3SP3R4T1ON?

you know fuck all about how bad i need this job

1 H4V3 M4N4G3D TH1S R3ST4UR4NT FOR TWO Y34RS NOW!
TRUST M3
NO ON3 WORKS 4T 4PPL3B33S W1THOUT 3XCRUC14T1NG D3SP3R4T1ON 4S TH3 ST1CK TO TH31R SLUGG4RDLY JOBS33K1NG DONK3Y

She’s got you straight down pegged and all you can do is try not to fidget in your plastic bucket seat as her sightless stare lasers straight through the whitewashed wall behind you.

whatever, you say finally, reluctantly, i guess theres a time and a place
for like
dick jokes
and maybe the time aint before you got a drink down you and maybe the place aint where theres no drinks to get
but im just saying
once youve sent out the apology letter
commiserations on fucking up your interview next time maybe keep the quesadilla steak stack boner on the downlow
if you wanna come out some time

Y3S?

im just sayin i got a fuckton more dick jokes where those ones came from

H4H4, she says, and watching the glare turn to a grin like she smelt your blood in the water is a boot to your ego’s balls, H4H4H4H4H4

is that a hell yes

NO 1T 1S 4 H4H4H4H4H4!
DO NOT L34P SO F4R 4H34D OF M3 1T 1S MOST UNCOUTH
4LSO YOU M1GHT TR1P
W3 4R3 NOT DON3 H3R3 Y3T

fuck
really

WH3N YOU 4R3 S3RV1NG 4 GU3ST YOU MUST 4LW4YS R3M3MB3R TH3 MOST 1MPORT4NT P4RT OF TH3 M34L

shit yeah you cant forget that thats like basic fuckin entry level restaurant etiquette
just the thought that someone might forget it is sending chilly tremors down my spine like death himself got jonesing for a tickle fight

R3M1ND M3! WH4T 1S TH3 MOST 1MPORT4NT P4RT OF TH3 M34L

uh

1T 1S TH3 SM1L3
>;]
> ;]
>;]
> ;]

oh god

(You don’t get the job, but you get her number and a slap on the butt in the door of the diner as you leave that makes a couple in a window booth choke on their chicken patties. As deals go you’ve made worse ones.)