BONUS ROUND 1

[hso_mods]

Bonus Round 1

Genre-Mixing

Hey, shippers! Welcome to your very first bonus round proper--we hope you have lots of fun with it! This time around we're going to be asking you to mix it up a little--each fanwork posted for this round will be a mish-mash of two different genres, blended together in a delightful incestuous slurry to create an UNSTOPPABLE CREATIVE CONCOCTION--er. Or. Something.

Yeah, we're genre-mixing. That's what we're doing this round.

Rules

1. Submit prompts! Prompts should consist of two different genres and one ship. This cannot be your team's ship! These are worth 5 points each, for a maximum of 100 points per team.


2. Look through the prompts and fill whichever you like!


3. You may not fill prompts for your ship, nor may you fill your own team's prompts.


4. Fills should be posted as replies to the prompts which they are for, following the format below. They may be any medium.

Title Format
If you are starting a new thread, please use this format in your title.
PROMPT: TEAM [YOUR SHIP]
Replace [YOUR SHIP] with the name of the team YOU belong to; please use the characters and quadrant, not whatever portmanteau or nickname you've come up with.
If your team name is not in this format and in the title we cannot guarantee that it will be counted.

If you are filling a prompt, use this format in your title.
FILL: TEAM [YOUR SHIP]
Replace [YOUR SHIP] with the name of the team YOU belong to; please use the characters and quadrant, not whatever portmanteau or nickname you've come up with.
If your team name is not in this format and in the title we cannot guarantee that it will be counted.

Posts not using this format in the title will be understood to be unofficial discussion posts, no matter what they contain. They, like all comments on the comm, are subject to the Wank Policy.

Scoring
For prompt posts: 5 points each (maximum of 100 per team)

For fills (as stated here):
First 5 entries in each post: 30 (per entry)
Entries 6-10 in each post: 20 (per entry)
Entries 11-15 in each post: 10 (per entry)
Entries 16+ in each post: 5 (per entry)

All scored content must be created/assembled new for this round.

If you have any questions, please ask them at the FAQ post here, or email them to us (homestuck.shipping at gmail). Otherwise, we cannot guarantee that we will see them in a timely fashion!

Comments

Fill: Team Dave<3Rose (Part 2)

[laughably_unimportant]

INTERVIEWER: Hurting eachother isn't the purpose then?

VANTAS: No, asswipe, it's just a byproduct, the purpose—listen, did you really ask me here to school you on romance, because while I'm a self-styled expert, anyone within a two-hundred mile radius could tell you I'm also an annoying loudmouthed idiot whose presence can barely be tolerated for the few short seconds it takes to run away screaming.

INTERVIEWER: You seem to have a very low opinion of yourself.

VANTAS: No fucking shit, flesh-eating-wormbeast breath. Stop the presses, tell them they've got a new cover story, "Karkat Vantas' self-esteem has sunk so low it's collapsed in on itself and created a new black hole, kiss your pathetic life goodbye because it's going to get sucked into the gaping maw of the tiniest angriest Napoleonic fucker to ever live, at least that will be an improvement over the empty shell you currently call a life," oh wait, can't run that, that was last week's breaking news.

INTERVIEWER: Does Mr. Egbert know you feel this way about yourself?

VANTAS: Listen, can you stop calling him Mister Egbert already, it makes me think of his dad, and that shit's just unnatural.

INTERVIEWER: I'm sorry. Does John know you feel this way about yourself?

VANTAS: Hell no, and if Harley ever tells him I'll dump her pitiable ass in a second, or I would if I could even hope to find someone half as fucking messed up as her.

INTERVIEWER: Miss Harley—Mr., John's sister?

VANTAS: Seriously, did you do absolutely no research before you came out here? Did they just pull some random human off the street, slap a hat on, pronounce you a representative of journalism? Yes John's goddamn sister, she's my matesprit, or girlfriend, or whatever. It's complicated.

INTERVIEWER: And John is okay with you dating his sister?
VANTAS: Why would I give a fuck if he's okay with it???

.

EGBERT: Of course I'm okay with it! They're actually really cute together, you should see it.

INTERVIEWER: There's no cause for jealousy?

EGBERT: Why would there be? We're in totally different quadrants, fulfilling different needs! If you're looking for jealousy, you'd be more likely to find it between moirails and matesprits, but Jade and Gamzee are fine with eachother. Jade's a lot more confrontational than most matesprits, sometimes I think she'd have made a better kismesis than me!

INTERVIEWER: Have you ever discovered what triggered your sudden relationship with Mr. Vantas?

EGBERT: No, I just woke up one day, and bam! Wanted to split his lip and lick the blood up, you know?
INTERVIEWER: Er, can't say that I do.

EGBERT: Well duh, of course not. I'm the only known human in a kismesis relationship with a troll. That's why you're doing this interview, right?

INTERVIEWER: That, and the unusual circumstances surrounding the beginning of your relationship with Mr. Vantas.

EGBERT: Heh, it's not all that unusual! I mean I guess it is, but also that I feel like Karkat and I were destined to be together, or something! It's kind of weird that I didn't even consider myself gay, and then I just woke up the next day feeling so strongly for Karkat, but this relationship is one of the best things to ever happen to me, so why would I want to examine it?

.

VANTAS: He said that?

INTERVIEWER: He seemed pretty adamant about it.

VANTAS: Then he's even more of a pathetic fuck than I thought. God, I could just crush his skull in.

INTERVIEWER: Because he's happy with this relationship?

VANTAS: I knew he was moronic, but this? Actually being joyful about the sack of shit he got saddled with as a kismesis, all glowing about it and bragging to complete strangers and, fuck, just, fuck.

INTERVIEWER: Is it because you don't like him being happy?
VANTAS: Of course I want him to be happy, I just don't want him to be happy with me, except I do, and I also want him miserable and crying and twisted tighter than a virgin's nook in pain, which hey, he actually has a shot of accomplishing within the scope of this relationship, whoop-de-fucking-do.

INTERVIEWER: How do you reconcile these warring desires?
VANTAS: They're not warring, they're the same thing.

INTERVIEWER: I don't understand.

VANTAS: Of course you don't. None of you fuckers get it. Look, listen up, because if I have to explain this one more time my scream of frustration will be so long and loud that it will shatter the eardrums of every pink money on the planet, leaving no one left to even give a fuck about what I have to say, wouldn't that be a change of pace.

VANTAS: Wanting Egbert to be happy and wanting to beat his face in isn't finding the corner on a circle. It's what we are. It's how we define ourselves against eachother, me and him. Wanting the other to succeed, pushing them to go farther, and then clawing them back down when they actually manage it.

.

[Like allowing me into his home, Mr. Egbert's welcoming attitude extended to allowing the crew to set up several hidden cameras in his house. He did, however, advise us to keep things a secret from Mr. Vantas, giving a wink and a playful "Shhhh," fingers placed over his lips.]

[Mr. Vantas stands at the end of Mr. Egbert's couch. Mr. Egbert faces him, several feet away, expression openly mocking and derisive. Mr. Vantas is visibly angry, face taking on a red tinge and hands balled into fists.]

EGBERT: And you think that means something? Wow, you really are dumb.

VANTAS: Shut the fuck up, you don't even know what you're talking about. I earned that title out of hundreds of contestants—

EGBERT: Who probably all got the same title as you! "We would like to award you a certificate of Literary Merit for your contribution"? That's so generic and dull, it's almost like you wrote it.

VANTAS: Oh, I'm sorry, maybe it would have been worth something more if it said "I'm so proud of you."

[Mr. Egbert advances on Mr. Vantas, forcing him to lean back against the arm of the couch.]

EGBERT: You take that back.

VANTAS: Wow, talk about mangrit, even the old man would cringe in embarrassment at the way you're pussyfooting around, can't even take a bit of harsh truth? Here, how bout this, we take a quick nap and I'll ask him—

EGBERT: Or maybe I'll ask your cat girlfriend who's the better man, huh, who could've protected her from the psycho murder-clown that was supposed to be his responsibility—

VANTAS: Says the guy who couldn't even be responsible for himself, let a fucking blind girl—

EGBERT: The same blind girl you got killed—

VANTAS: That wasn't even me you dumb shit, that was a doomed timeline—

EGBERT: —just goes to prove that Karkat Vantas is an incalculable failure in every timeline!

VANTAS: At least in some of my timelines, I actually managed to keep the people I care about alive!

[With an inarticulate cry, Mr. Egbert drives Mr. Vantas back onto the couch. They proceed to pull and rip at eachother's clothing amidst violent kisses, drawing blood and continuing to berate eachother when feasible.]

EGBERT: No you [pant], didn't, that's the fucking point.

VANTAS: That's fate [pant] fucking [pant] me over. Again.

EGBERT: Fate only fucks you [pant] if you let her.

VANTAS: I know.

EGBERT: Do you?

VANTAS: I know.

EGBERT: Good. Pound that into your [pant] brain, while I'm pounding it into your ass. [The sound of a zipper sliding down.]

VANTAS: Shut up.

EGBERT: Make me.

VANTAS: Don't, [pant] challenge me.

EGBERT: Because you couldn't, [low sound] live up to it even if you tried?

VANTAS: Fuck you.

EGBERT: No, fuck you!

VANTAS: Shut up and let me!
EGBERT: Work for it!

[Inarticulate snarling]

.

VANTAS: He's fucking me.

INTERVIEWER: Pardon?

VANTAS: Get your mind off the musclebeast train, not like that, though yeah, like that.

VANTAS: Look, I know you pathetic pukes hate yourselves, don't even try to get around that, half your fucking economy is built on hating yourself. So you should know what I mean when I talk about wanting yourself to succeed, and wanting to utterly destroy yourself because you don't deserve to succeed. Egbert being happy with me is about the sorriest thing I ever heard, because he's basically saying all he deserves is me, which means all I deserve is me, and I'm a rotten fuck, in case that wasn't crystallized-carbon-fucking-clear.

VANTAS: We're basically perfect for eachother, and that's pathetic as shit.

EGBERT: He really said that?

INTERVIEWER: That was the gist of it.

EGBERT: Aw, what a sweetheart! Tell him I said I can do way better than him.

[faintly] VANTAS: I can hear you, you oblivious fuck!

[shouting] EGBERT: Doesn't change what I said!

[faintly] VANTAS: Fuck off!

[shouting] EGBERT: Save that for the bedroom! [smiles]

EGBERT: You sure I can't get you something to drink?

Re: Fill: Team Dave&lt;3Rose (Part 2)

[lustfullyc.livejournal.com]

fgllgfdjk!!!!!!
Yes...

Just yes.