hs_olympics | BONUS ROUND 3

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bonus round

BONUS ROUND 3

Bonus Round 3

Retro Gaming

Hi shippers! Welcome to Bonus Round 3.
In this round, you'll be creating fanworks based on video and computer games from before 2000!

Rules

Choose a game that was released before 2000, and post a fanwork based on the game in some way. Make sure to use the appropriate title format (see below). Examples include: character inserts, rewritten dialogue, costume redesigns, alternate soundtracks, theme song covers, photoshopped promo art, etc.

Your fill should not be focused on Homestuck characters playing the game--the point of this round is to make a crossover.

For this challenge, you are allowed to submit fills based on your team ship. You don't have to, of course!

For this challenge, there is no minimum wordcount. We are trusting you not to abuse that fact!

This challenge will run until 11:59PM EDT July 21. After that time, even if it's just by a minute according to the timestamp, no submissions will be accepted for points.

Title Format
Please use this format in your title.

Replace [YOUR SHIP] with the name of the team YOU belong to; please use the characters and quadrant, not whatever portmanteau or nickname you've come up with.
If your team name is not in this format and in the title we cannot guarantee that it will be counted.
Replace [GAME TITLE] and [YEAR RELEASED] as appropriate.

Posts not using this format in the title will be understood to be unofficial discussion posts, no matter what they contain. They, like all comments on the comm, are subject to the Wank Policy.

Scoring
(as stated here)
First 5 entries per team: 30 (per entry)
Entries 6-10: 20 (per entry)
Entries 11-15: 10 (per entry)
Entries 16+: 5 (per entry)

All content must be created new for this round.

We would prefer that any questions about this challenge or anything else in the HSO be emailed to us at homestuck.shipping AT gmail!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

(excuse to draw long-haired nepeta whelp)

her horns are in that bun thingy

Jade sighed, rolling over. The bed was just so warm and comfortable... She sat up abruptly. This was no time for sleeping! It was a new day, and she had to get to work!

She jumped out of bed, scratching Bec's ears as he trotted towards her. A piece of bread was enough for breakfast and then she was off, opening the door and stepping outside.

Her farm. Her home. She walked forward, savouring the sights. It was a little bare here and there, sure, but it was beautiful to her. There were the crops she had planted, all tomatoes and corn. And there was the barn - she only had a couple of cows at the moment, but she loved them dearly, as well as her five chickens.

Jade breathed in deeply, smelling the fresh air, and enjoyed the feel of the morning sun on her skin.

She grinned, pushing up her sleeves. It was time to get to work!

*

Jade walked through the town, hitching the backpack more comfortably on her back. She's already travelled to the mountain to pick flowers (and planned to go there that afternoon for some fishing) and was passing through each of the buildings to say hello to her friends. She'd already greeted John and Jane in the cafe and Rose in her home plus Gamzee at the general store, but there was one other person she was particularly looking forward to seeing. She smiled to herself, unable to resist quickening her pace as she approached the animal store.

"Good morning!" she cried, bursting through the door.

"Um, hello," Tavros greeted from the counter, waving a little.

"How are things over here? Is Horsaroni doing better?"

Tavros nodded earnestly. "Yeah, definitely - much better! I think she just, um, was a little sick? She's much better now."

"That's great!" Jade beamed, leaning in the front counter.

But Tavros only smiled nervously in response, avoiding her eyes. Jade tilted her head curiously. In such a quiet place as this little village, everyone tended to get into routines with one another, especially the people they talked to every day. Normally at this point Tavros would ask about Jade's cows and chickens and crops and they'd talk for a while until she went on her way. Maybe today was different?

"Heh...um, Aradia's been around some more as well! It's been really great having her around!"

Jade paused, then couldn't help but laugh. Well, there was only so exciting this place could get, anyway! "I'm happy to hear that! I should really go see her more often - she sounds really nice!"

"She is," Tavros agreed and Jade giggled.

"Oh! And..." Jade shrugged her backpack from one shoulder, rummaging through it. "This!" She handed him the small flower, the same one she picked from the mountain every day for Tavros.

At this point, Tavros would normally smile and thank her profusely for the gift. But again, he surprised her.

Tavros took the flower hesitantly, looking down at it. "Um...th-thanks a lot! I really appreciate it..."

Jade watched him, overcome with a sudden urge to hug him. Geez, he was so cute! After a moment's thought, she settled on resting her chin on her hands and telling him so.

"Er...r-really?"

"Yes!"

Tavros flushed and Jade shook her head, smiling even harder. He just kept getting cuter and cuter!

But, unfortuantely... Jade stepped backwards, putting her backpack on again. "Well, I should be off. If I don't leave soon, I won't catch Kanaya before she leaves for Rose's!"

"Of course! Um, goodbye!"

Jade waved goodbye, stepping lightly as she left the store. What an odd day! Or was it? Tavros had been acting a little weirdly, but it wasn't so strange... But Jade let herself grin a little, thinking about the flower she'd pick for him tomorrow. It was just a little thing, but she couldn't help but get the impression that they'd grown closer today, somehow. And that, even if it was just a little thing, was enough to make her whole day brighter.

(guest-starring Karkat as Salamando...I guess Dave is Dyluck.)

Hiroki Kikuta, who composed the excellent music for SoM, went on to start the company that created Shadow Hearts. I read that the series did okay, but I never meet anyone else who's played it.

Edited (why do my image links keep breaking...) 2012-07-22 00:08 (UTC)

Shadow Hearts? I've played Shadow Hearts! I didn't realize it was the same guy. I thought Yoko Shimomura did the tunes for SOM. But I admit I haven't played through the entirety of Shadow Hearts. But I do own it! ONE OF THESE DAYS.

This entry is awesome and you are awesome and Dyluck Dave is awesome.

lmfao i swear this wasn't on purpose PS ENTRY BEFORE MINE YOU'RE GREAT.... ok

I'm pretty sure that having matching entries really just means we both have the best taste in games. |D

(no subject)

vannyjae - 2012-07-22 01:04 (UTC) - Expand

The Psiionic frowned. But finally, the door opened, revealing the beautiful Disciple.

"Good afternoon. What do you desire to talk about?"

The Disciple, leader of the powerful civilisation of the Leos,was a strange one. The Psiionic first encountered her circa 3,000 BC, his second contact civilisation after the Sufferer. They had never been extremely close - never quite reached that worshipful state that the Psiionic previously possessed with the Sufferer - but at this stage she may be his greatest ally.

"Technology, first. Shall we get that out of the way?"

She agreed swiftly, smoothly exchanging her knowledge of refrigeration for his of machine tools.

"And now what do you really want?"

The Psiionic stood, gingerly stepping down from his throne. Whose idea was it to put it up so high anyway? When he ordered the renovation he just thought they'd make it a bit more modern, not putting it on a desk. Well, whatever. He stepped forward, looking the Disciple straight in the eye.

"Can we trust the Signless?"

The Disciple stared at him, her jaw dropped. "Of course we can! We've all been in an alliance for thousands of years - what's making you say this now?" She glared suddenly. "Are you thinking of betraying him?"

"Of course not!" He barked. "But things are different now, and with The Condesce breathing down my throat from the west-" He cut himself off, sighing. "The Signless...is not the man he used to be."

The Disciple continues to glare. "He is a wonderful man. He freed his people from an oppressive, tyrannical overlord and preaches peace all over the world. That has never changed."

"No. But..." The Psiionic steeples his fingers. How to venture this? "You continue to believe that his actions...reflect these things?"

"Of course." The Disciple shuffles uncomfortably and crosses her arms, and he knows he has her.

"He has been behaving strangely ever since he acquired that technology. I cannot-"

"He is still a good man," the Disciple repeats, and the Psiionic grimances as he realises that she is backing away. "And that will never change. Good day." But right before she leaves, she stops to say, "and keep your men out of my territory!"

The Psiionic stares. "They'll be gone next month! They're only there so I can get a better look at the Condesce's cities. Isn't that obvious?"

"Still." And with that, she leaves.

The Psiionic sighs. Well, it had been a far-off hope to believe that the Disciple would favour him over the Signless. And now he knows.

That evening, he prepares for his meeting with the Signless.

True to form, the man arrives as cordially as ever, bowing respectfully.

"Great Psiionic, I am thankful for the opportunity to speak to you again. My peace ever flourish between our two nations."

"Yes, and-"

Suddenly, the Signless glares, booming loudly, "OUR WORDS ARE BACKED BY NUCLEAR WEAPONS!"

The Psiionic stared. The Signless stared back.

"...um, yeah, sure."

The Signless nodded with a smile, suddenly serene as ever.

"I asked you here to discuss the threat from the West."

"Ah, yes, the Condesce..." The Signless frowned, stroking his chin. "You wish for support waging war?"

"Anything would be a help."

The Signless nodded slowly. "I do not approve of war unless it is absolutely necessary, but her regime is truly corrupt, and is only become more oppressive. If I can do anything to tear down that caste system, I will."

"Thank you deeply." The Psiionic bowed.

"Well, I suppose there's only one choice, then." The Psiionic took out a notebook. "How many cities in Pisces, then?"

"I'm not certain of the exact figure, but around 40?"

"Forty nukes...right. Gotcha."

"What? Seriously?" The Psiionic stared. "You're - you're seriously going to just nuke them all? Just like that?"

The Signless shrugged. "Sure! Why not?"

"Won't all the people die? The people you're trying to liberate?"

The Signless stared. "I...don't think I'm following."

The Psiionic sighed. Well, maybe it was better off having the man on his side than the opposite, at least...

"Well, I have things to take care of at present - one of my cities is revolting; you know how it is - so I guess we'll see one another later?"

"Of course."

The Signless bowed. "I hope from the depths of my heart that someday, we will live in a world where there is no need for conflict."

"The same."

The Signless left, stoic as ever, but there was an odd spring to his fingers where he tapped the notebook.

The Psiionic's eye twitched.

Edited (Whoops tense.) 2012-07-21 09:45 (UTC)

oooh, I like this... eerie and interesting :D there is so little fanfiction showing the difference between the Signless and the Sufferer. I wonder what happened to him in this AU/game to tempt him to nuclear weapons- "just" power corruption?

I apologize for how bad these are.
Hours upon hours in GIMP with a mouse.... also I have no artistic ability.
Obviously I got lazy with the second one,

Dave as link :D

Oh, wow, this is really lovely.

The bomb explodes hundreds of feet above you, shattering into a million pieces of shrapnel that will riddle your base and you can feel her staring at you.

"There's only six cities left." As always Rose sounds smug and self assured, even with the endless fire of napalm being thrown against her planet. You half expect to see her non-challantly filing her nails when you look over, but she is standing thoughtfully, one hand on her chin. She's sticks out in the military base like a sore thumb with her fancy purple dress and immaculate beehive. "How much longer do you really think you can last?"

"I don't know, do I look like a fucking stopwatch?" You shrug and turn back to your computer, sending out more missiles. Soon her royal alien bitchiness will realize that you can't protect everyone if she attacks from everywhere and you can't afford to lose anyone. Dirk is in one of those cities, the remnants of John's family in another. Jade is manning one of your bases with her grandson and Rose's daughter in hiding out in the other.

But for now you don't have to make that choice and that's enough. You can work with this. "I'll last as long as I last."

"It's futile." The barrage of explosives hasn't slown a bit and neither has your typing. As much as you'd love to engage in a passive aggressive snark war with Rose you've got better things to do. In absence of a response she continues. "They have endless resources. They can go forever and all we have is six, pathetic cities."

"Heard you the first time."

"She will win." Rose's voice is cold, but you think you see what she's getting at. "This game is unbeatable."

You spare her a brief glance and a half smile. "No reason to stop trying."

She smiles back at you, pulling her needles seemingly out of nowhere. "I couldn't agree more."

Edited (missed a part) 2012-07-21 16:21 (UTC)

You check the magazine of your gun once more - a Beretta 92F Samurai Edge, standard department issue - before snapping it closed. Five at the dogs outside and one at the lock on the front door makes nine. Not nearly enough for a proper excursion into this gloomy shitheap of a mansion. From Meenah's nearby hissed epithets, you're pretty sure that she's up in the same predicament you are.

Great.

Isn't this just a veritable cornucopia of suck?
Scratch's immediate order to split up just exemplifies everything in this trainwreck - namely that no one has kept their shit together.

Not like there's a lot of it to keep together anyway. Nitram buggered off with the chopper at the first sign of trouble, half of Alpha Team is missing or dead, and there's still no trace of Leijon and the rest of Bravo Team.

Well, you've stalled as long as you can. Nothing left to do but book passage on the S.S. Clusterfuck and drift away down the river of We're Screwed.

Meenah ambles over, cigarette in hand and eyebrows raised in a silent question. You nod, fold your shades into an open front pocket on your vest, and pull out your lighter as she leans in to make it easier. A flick of the wheel is rewarded with a "Thanks, guppy," and a long draw.

"No problem, Ariel. Anything for my favorite mermaid wannabe."

"Clam it, Strider. No need for your shit, I already got zombies all up in my gills." She's smiling, though; for all your little barbs, you're still bros.

"You feeling as off about this as I am? Zombies, haunted mansion right off a movie set, all that jazz?"

"Yeah. Weird's shit's going down out here, and I don't think we're gettin' any kelp from anyone else." She inhales deeply, taps ash off the butt, then drops it and grinds it out on the Carrara marble floor of the foyer. "Ready when you are."

"See you in an hour, princess."

"Later, shrimp."

You slide your shades back on as you ready your gun and edge into an adjacent corridor.

Edited 2012-07-21 16:53 (UTC)

I'm running out of retro games that I know of. D: So, when all else fails, POKEMON.

(My favorite piece of fiction or anything ever! I wish I'd had more time to work on this, but such is life. Also I can't write fight scenes to save my life so yeah OTL)

---------------------------------------------------------------------

You stand, facing the most dreaded enemy of all Trollkind. Yet you don’t have time to feel fear. It’s more important to finish your stalemate once and for all.

You’d defeated Lord English before, but not completely. He’d been sealed away, ending the war between the Cherubs he commanded and the Trolls. It had been foolish to simply seal him away, as you know now. This whole tournament, supposedly a set up to find those strong enough to face English just in case, had been a set up.

You’d known it was fishy right when you heard of it, but you could have never guessed it had been put together by Doc Scratch, a devotee of English. Yet that was how things had gone. Upon revealing himself, Scratch had stated that he needed a sacrifice to free his lord, setting his eyes on you as the winner of this farce of a tournament. You defeated him fairly easily, though he simply laughed at you as he drew his last breaths, becoming the sacrifice he’d wanted.

Thus, English now stood before you. You felt annoyed to have been so easily manipulated, yet this gave you a chance to finish this now and for all and eradicate the greatest threat to all Trolls. If anyone can kill Lord English, it’s you, and you know it well.

So you fought. It was too much of a blur, body parts flying and hitting each other with English’s magic in full force you. You had a similar force, and you made use of it. He had been surprised by it the first time you’d used it against him, though he had since given up on figuring out why your powers were so strong.

Soon enough, you were both worn down. You could feel the grey of your face cracking, at which English paused, his flashing eyes boring through you. You smirked, appearing confident as you pulled the cracking mask away, revealing your true nature.

“Calliope?” His first response was to lunge towards you, which proved fairly easy to avoid. “Where have you been all this time? Why do you refuse to fall under my control?”

“I can’t agree with what you’ve done.” You reply, prepared to defend or attack as necessary. “I’ve vowed to destroy every Cherub under your control, to protect the Trolls from the havoc you’ve brought upon them.”

“But you yourself are a Cherub, simply pretending to be a troll.” He scoffed, coming at you with newfound anger. This anger brought about irrationality, the magical shots from his gun whizzing every which way with little aim and his peg leg actually beginning to trip him up. If you’d known this would happen, you would have revealed your identity sooner.

You aimed carefully, your wand transforming into a pistol and firing a magical shot. You hated your true form as well as this most powerful version of your weapon, but it was a necessary evil to take Lord English down. Shots grazed you as you took aim, powering up a final shot as you were hit with many of his. Pain seared through you as his ordinary shots were more powerful than yours. Yet you knew standing still and preparing this shot would be worth it.

You aimed and took fire, hitting English straight in the chest. He reeled back, falling to the ground, weapon clattering to the ground. You approached as quickly as you could, slowed down by all your wounds, kicking the weapon away as soon as you could. You leaned forward, almost falling from your dizziness. Some of your wounds were already healing, as were English’s. Yet that shot had proved too much. The hole in his chest gaped, his eyes blinking at a slower rate as he looked at you with disgust.

You aimed a last shot at his face, unsure what to say as he opened his mouth to speak.

“It was nice to see you again Calliope.” His voice dripped with contempt, and that was it. You shot. There was no way he could be alive. You made sure in every way you could, growing stronger due to your healing by the second. English had stopped healing, further confirming his state of death.

You lowered your head for a second before disappearing. The previous leader of the Troll army would surely appear soon. He could take the credit for this, you wouldn’t mind. The two of you clashed in many ways, and you were sure he’d know you had done the deed. Yet it would be better for the citizens of Alternia to think that their glorified army commander had taken down Lord English, rather than a freakishly strong troll they might begin to suspect as being something else entirely.

Roxy in the role of Candy Kong (Donkey Kong's girlfriend. She runs the save point.)

Bro as Donkey Kong. He uses a banana sword.

Ironic farming turns out to be a shit-ton more work than you thought it'd be. It's barely been three weeks and all you've got are these shriveled up crackly vines and absolutely nothing in the way of crops. Apparently you're supposed to water your plants every day? The Mayor conveniently forgot to mention that when he handed you the deed to your farm and the reins to a horse, and there's no way in hell you're calling up Harley to ask for help.

You could putter around your sorry excuse for tomato plants all day and fight with your chickens, but that's boring as shit, so you spend your time harassing John instead. Egbert's at least as pathetic as you are--he's all set up to inherit his grandma's bakery when she croaks, except he can't even get near bread pudding without blanching. He's literally the only guy in town who won't hand out cakes on Thanksgiving--even you managed to piece together something that resembled walnut cake. You sat next to John on the pier, stuffing down sweets while he attempted to fish. He swore up and down that you can catch a power berry out here in winter, but he never did, and you got sick of cake.

One of these days the two of you will get bored of tossing rocks into the potluck and sneaking into the wine cellar. You'll saddle up your horse and ditch this place for good, maybe find something the two of you don't suck at. But right now, though, right now you're wondering how many times you can nominate John for Flower Princess before you get caught.

Once upon a time, you were just a little girl who never wanted to hurt anyone. Even as a child you showed signs of extraordinary powers and you dreamed of a new, perfect universe, cleansed by light. You saw things others didn't and you knew things you shouldn't have known but you never intended to use that knowledge as a weapon, like most feared. You suffered at the hands of many, especially your father-in-law.

He became convinced that you would make the perfect sacrifice to birth a horrible god for the cult, The Order. You still remember his silky, conniving voice speaking a ritual as hot flames enveloped your entire body. You had tried not to scream while your flesh blistered and cracked and melted and you felt an evil build up inside of you.

But one of the many things you'd Seen involved a way to start over: a way to cause a scratch that separated yourself into two, leaving a new portion of yourself to live on happily while the other remained as a burnt prison for the horrorterror the cult wished to unleash.

For seven years you've been hidden in the basement of a hospital, on the edge between life and death. You have vivid dreams of your village and your experiences and in your nightmares, your monsters become real. You wish to see the cult suffer.

Your name is Rose Lalonde and you created the Otherworld out of your fear and hatred.

What will you do?

Link to image: http://i.imgur.com/XsFRO.jpg

Edited 2012-07-21 21:56 (UTC)

You are Karkat Vantas and one of your many interests includes romantic comedies. You’ve been stuck on a meteor for an entire fucking sweep already and your one solace is the opportunity to escape to your private chambers and pop in an alchemized film to enjoy all by yourself while the others read boring books and drink horrible coffee or whatever it is they all do. You like your quiet moments of escape.

“Karkat?”

You growl and pause your movie, looking over at the doorway exasperatedly. “What now, Kanaya?”

The look on her face is a mixture of disgust at your attitude and determination to make you come back up to the main rooms. “I simply think it would be a good idea for you to join us,” she says matter-of-factly. “Especially as our leader.”

You snort. You were the leader, back when there was a team to lead and a game to win. Now you’re all sitting beakbeasts, traipsing through dream bubbles and waiting to finally, fucking finally, reach your destination.

“Think I’d rather stick with my movies,” you tell her, and then you look away and unpause before she has time to retort. She stands there and watches with a disappointed look on her face before turning on her heel and walking away.

Fifteen minutes later, you hear her come back and you prepare to bark at her to just let it go already, you have nothing to offer especially with a real fucking Knight and Seer around and all these god tiered alternate timeline Karkats who have all the fucking answers, but you see a crackle of white energy in the corner of your eye.

It’s Rose. She’s smiling sweetly which only means she’s up to something you’d rather not be a part of, and her stupid needle wands are pointed at you.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” you question.

“Kanaya has informed me that you’d rather watch movies than plan with the rest of us. Really, Karkat I’m wounded. I thought we were friends.”

You’ve had just about enough of the meddling. You were a good leader until the Scratch, can you not just have a moment to yourself to mope about your failures and misgivings now? You chuck the television remote at the wall and jump up onto your feet. Rose doesn’t even flinch, god you hate how no one ever even flinches. You open your mouth to respond but she holds up a hand, silencing you.

“I’m not here to force you to come with me, but I do think I’ve found a way for you to get your fill of the televised entertainment, and once you’ve made your way through this, perhaps you’ll grant us the gift of your presence.”

Before you can ask what she means, the light from her wands grows and envelops you. “Damnit, Lalonde!” you screech, but you get the feeling she can’t hear you anymore. An odd sensation comes over you and when the light fades, you’re in a whole new world.

“What the actual fuck.” You groan. You’re standing in a foggy cemetery and Rose is gone, you’re the only one there. Up ahead, there’s a question mark floating in the air and yeah, you sure do have a lot of questions about this situation, so you walk towards it, poking it curiously with your sickle.

The question mark turns into a flat digital screen that tells you to Collect the television remotes to advance to the next level!

You reread it and then stare at it and then reread it again. This is a stupid, twisted joke, and Lalonde is going to pay, once you get out of this madness. You sigh and head through the pathways of the cemetery, in search of the remotes.

Before going up to end the Nightmare, you go to visit the beach one last time.

You know he'll be there when you start hearing the first strains of notes from his lyre, a cascade of arpeggios drifting towards you on the ocean wind. Soon enough, you round a dune and there he is, sitting on a driftwood log: the ginger-haired boy who pulled you out of the ocean all those days ago. His head is bent and his eyelids half-closed, all his concentration in the quick fingers flitting and pulling at the strings of the instrument in his lap. You wish you could stay and watch him a while, but the nervous knot at the pit of your stomach reminds you of your anticipation; you can't linger.

When you call to him, his head snaps up, and he sets his lyre to rest.

"'Sup, hero."

"Not much, cool guy!" you call, tone light to mask your anxiousness. "Just about to go end this horrible dream, is all."

You stand in the sand facing him, and he raises a solitary eyebrow. "You got all the sacred instruments?" You nod, grinning. "Pretty impressive, Jade. Shit, all this time and no one around here ever even managed to get a single one. And you cornered the market on all eight, just like that? Guess you can trust immigrants after all."

You can't help but laugh a little into your hand. "Hah, right! And you know, soon I'll be the biggest name in the Nightmare-slaying business. Just gotta go take care of the big one, and then you'll see my name in lights, just wait!"

You both smile, but his is clearly wistful. You can't really blame him.

A seagull cries directly above your head, then, and you both look up. The sky is very clear.

After a moment, eyes still fixed on the few wisps of cloud skittering above on the wind, you ask carefully, "Nothing... nothing bad's going to happen to Koholint, right. When I wake up the Wind Fish Princess? It's what I'm supposed to do, what's supposed to happen." Your throat feels suddenly dry; you swallow. "Right?"

You look back at Dave, but his gaze is still fixed on the sky. The seagulls you were looking for finally show themselves, freewheeling lazily against the perfect blue.

"Damn," he finally says, softly. "You know, it would be great to be a bird. No worries, no responsibilities. Just kind of free." After a few more seconds, he closes his eyes, sighs, and looks you squarely in the face once more. "Dunno, Jade," he finally answers. "But you gotta do what needs doing, hey? Princess can't sleep forever."

"Yeah," you say, smiling. You don't know why it feels like you're saying goodbye.

(Shark teeth in a painted mouth flash in a smile of awful gratitude, and as the Wind Fish Princess wakes, the dying fabric of reality dissipates around you.

As you tread water sleepily in the open ocean where the dream of Koholint Island used to be, a single crow catches a sea breeze beneath its wings high overhead.)

Content warning for non-consensual magical transformations, language, and, uhh, Dirk's tastes.

ThisIsProfoundlyRidiculous.txt

*

With a flourish of his sword, King Dirk burst into the lair of the evil Enchanter Clown.

"Sup," he declared. "I'm here to save the members of my family that you seem to have shrunk to pocket size for some reason."

The nefarious Enchanter Clown looked up, shocked, from the large glass jar on his spellcasting table. In it, a tiny castle, complete with miniature castle inhabitants, was clearly visible. King Dirk's miniscule family waved to him frantically from the tiny castle's tiny balcony.

The Enchanter, getting over his surprise, greasily drew his jokerkind specibus."I wouldn't be up and getting so high and mighty that your breaking and done entering into my private property is all accomplished righteously, my brother," he gritted through a toothy grin as he advanced on the King. "Maybe it'll turn out it was me who was working for what's right and just all along!"

"I don't really see how that's possible," the King deadpanned.

"Well well well, looks like the old King would be motherfuckin' up and surprised -- scandalized even -- if he went and got knowing what all I knew."

"I doubt it. Lay it on me."

"It was Prince Dave," the Enchanter spat with vitriol, "that all went and stole up the miracles from my raucous religion in the first motherfuckin' place!"

In the jar, Princess Rosella fixed her brother with a withering look.

"Oh come on, Rose," the Prince pleaded, obviously flustered. "I can, uh. I can explain?"

"Can you now."

"Lmao, baby boy," said the Queen. "You fucked up."

Meanwhile, the King and the Enchanter squared off dramatically on a balcony.

"Hee hee hooooooo, King Dirk!" cried Owl Cal, "Prepare yourself for Animal-Transformation Strife, hoooo!"

"Holy shit," intoned the King. "Now that sounds right up my alley."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Page 11 of 13

BONUS ROUND 3

Bonus Round 3

FILL: TEAM ARADIA<3SOLLUX - SUper Mario Bros (1985)

FILL: TEAM ARADIA<3SOLLUX - Street Fighter II (1991)

FILL: TEAM JADE<3KANAYA<3ROSE - Harvest Moon (1996)

FILL: TEAM Karkat♥Sollux - Secret of Mana (1993)

Re: FILL: TEAM Karkat♥Sollux - Secret of Mana (1993)

FILL: TEAM Dave<3Karkat - Secret of Mana (1993)

Re: FILL: TEAM Dave<3Karkat - Secret of Mana (1993)

(no subject)

FILL: TEAM JADE<3KANAYA<3ROSE - Civilisation II (1996)

Re: FILL: TEAM JADE<3KANAYA<3ROSE - Civilisation II (1996)

FILL: TEAM Dave<3John - Power Stone (1999)

FILL: TEAM Eridan <3 Feferi - The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time (1998)

FILL: TEAM ERIDAN<3FEFERI - Megami Ibunroku Persona (1996)

FILL: TEAM ERIDAN <3 FEFERI - LEGEND OF ZELDA: OCARINA OF TIME (1998)

Re: FILL: TEAM ERIDAN <3 FEFERI - LEGEND OF ZELDA: OCARINA OF TIME (1998)

FILL: TEAM DAVE<3TEREZI - Missile Command (1980)

Fill: Team Rose<3Roxy - Resident Evil (1996)

FILL: Team John<3Rose - Pokemon Red/Blue (1996)

FILL: TEAM Eridan <3< Sollux - Pokemon Red/Blue (1996)

FILL: TEAM Dave<3John - Guilty Gear (1998)

FILL: TEAM Bro <3 John - Donkey Kong Country (1994)

FILL: TEAM Dave<3Terezi - Harvest Moon 64 (1999)

FILL: TEAM DAVE<3ROSE- Oregon Trail (1974)

FILL: TEAM DIRK<>ROXY - SILENT HILL (1999)

FILL: TEAM KARKAT<3TEREZI - POKEMON SNAP (1999)

FILL: TEAM DIRK<>ROXY - GEX (1995)

FILL: TEAM JADE<3ROSE - Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening DX (1998)

FILL: TEAM DIRK<>ROXY - BERZERK (1982)

FILL: TEAM [JOHN<3DAVE] - [EARTHBOUND] ([1994])

FILL: TEAM JADE<3ROSE - King's Quest V (1990)